COWBOYS and ALIENS 2.0*** (but barely)




I went in with little expectations on this one. I expected Cowboys & Aliens and that’s all I got. What more could I ask for right? I could ask for a coherent semi-intelligent story with a point to it which this movie did not come close to delivering. I wasn't so much disappointed with the cowboys, but the aliens were another story and turned out to be the dumbest “high intelligent” aliens I’ve had the pleasure or displeasure of watching … they were just ridiculous. The movie never explained why they were on Earth except for wanting all of Earth’s gold. But why ???? There was no reason for this movie to be made other than to take my money and dupe those wanting something new and different from the standard conventional western or sci-fi movie. This movie was pretty much two hours of cowboys riding around on horses. Occasionally interrupted by battles with the aliens and their super-duper spacecrafts, rocket propelled fire bombs and lasso devices that would snatch up the poor westerners and zip them off to the spaceship. Never an explanation for the abduction.s

This film is botched by horrible writing and not because the genres do not mix. Science Fiction and Cowboys have been around before. Do you remember a certain Yul Brynner film ( “Westworld”) and what about the exciting conclusion to the "Back to the Future" trilogy, but those films had imagination, consistent and talented writing.

Also, and unbelievably, there was not one character in the movie that said... "Holy Cow. Look at that! Wow! Did you see those ugly and creepy creatures . AND THEY CAN FLY!" All the characters underplayed their reaction to something that would scare the hell out of us modern day folks. But the cowboys stuck to their tough, rough rider exteriors as if they were used to seeing such things as just some ornery cattle rustlers to contend with. Let me say again, these aliens are lightning fast, bigger than a horse, creepy and terrifying as hell and shoot rocket propelled grenades off their arms while the cowboys, on the other hand, were constantly emptying their six shooters and rifles at them getting off some of the most lucky shots imaginable. I know, it's a movie. But come on now.
With stars like Daniel Craig and Harrison Ford, it was a real disappointment. The story begins when a man (Daniel Craig) with no name and no memory wakes up in the middle of the desert. He has no idea how he got there but it appears he has been in some sort of violent situation and there is a metal bracelet attached to his wrist. The stranger unluckily attractst attacks from a multitude off unsavory characters, and then along come the aliens. He’s allowed to join up with a posse headed by Harrison Ford which rides around a lot pursuing the aliens . No-name Craig may not remember his past, but he certainly remembers how to fight and shoot. He’s a one man army against far superior weapons … but remember in our minds he’s James Bond … just transported by time to the 1800’s.

If I was you, I’d hop in my car and ride off into the sunset to find a better movie.